Vacuoiteration
It was a while ago that I found a new avenue to my pedantry, and one which is particularly irksome, especially as it has fallen into such common usage that I even find myself accidentally uttering such contraventions of my own formalisation of English.
The crime is to repeat words contained within an acronym after it, with such depressingly common examples as LCD display, HIV virus, GPS system and, most frequently abused, PIN number.
During a conversation with a chap studying for a degree in Natural Sciences at the University of Cambridge, attempts were made to name this phenomenon. After the ironic RWS syndrome (those without imagination may hover their mouse over it and find out what it stands for) was rejected, it was decided to reach for the Latin dictionary and come up with a proper word. Thus was born:
Vacuoiteration n. the practice of repeating oneself unnecessarily, esp. the final word of an acronym or abbreviation.
This is, however, not the only word in whose genesis I have played a part. Having co-written an entire dictionary, I have also defined a fair few currently-existing words, wasting a goodly part of Years 8 and 9 in the process.
However, to the creations…
Walkerism n. 1 a sentence within which a statement is made and subsequently flatly contradicted. 2 a sentence which is contradictory by implication due to circumstance.
I shall not go into depth here. For samples, visit Statto’s Little Blue Book of Walkerisms, and get collecting!
It once struck me that “pyromaniac” was an entirely useless word: have you ever met anyone who thinks fireworks are rubbish and wouldn’t play with matches given the chance?! My survey of a local young offenders’ institute didn’t find a single person. So, I invented a word for that, too:
Pyrosomnia n. a condition whose sufferers are bored by fire.
Strictly, this means people who fall asleep on seeing fire - possibly a rather dangerous condition, especially if you ever find yourself in a flaming building - but it sounds rather better than the strictly etymologically-correct alternative, ‘pyrolassitude’. Rather better, of course, than pyroanaesthesia, which presumably implies that flames induce unconsciousness, pyrophilia, which is presumably quite sexy until you barbecue your bits and pyroamnesia, whose definition I have just forgotten having glanced at a candle.
Goodnight.
January 31st, 2005 at 11:55
In subsequent conversation with a philologist, I have established that the first creation listed here should be spelt vacuoïteration to specify that the two adjacent vowels must be pronounced separately.
Without this diaeresis, the vowels will merge, leading to it being pronounced “vaquoiteration” or similar in future. Ironically, the philologist’s name is Chloë, which would also wither without its double-dot thing into “Klo”, like “roe”.
January 31st, 2005 at 14:38
Speaking of PIN numbers, I recently received a leaflet from the Halifax informing of this system. It contained two horrendously cheesy lines, with even more horrendous repercussions if attempted…
It claimed that we need to personalise our PINs, consequently “Put the ‘I’ in PIN” .
However, in an unforgivable linguistic crime, they used the same device at the bottom of the page, claiming “Put the PIN in ShopPINg” …
Obviously the publicity designed only survived half of their media studies course or something. Everyone knows that there are more linguistic devices for slogans. Like parallelisms, which have become wonderfully overused too…
“Think stationery. Think Rymans.” Hmm…
I hope they didn’t get paid for writing that one.